The English language was born in southwest Russia, six thousand years ago.
Its evolution has been the result of cultural influences; many remain unknown.
The language of Britain itself was Celtic when the Romans invaded in 55BC,
The English language began when Germanic tribes invaded in fifth century AD.
Modern English developed between 1500 and 1800, including Shakespearean days.
He alone coined more than 1600 English words in his collection of sonnets and plays.
The tongue continues to develop and evolve and new meanings are often fitted,
In the eleventh century “silly” meant blessed, while “nice” meant dim-witted.
But that evolution has made it convoluted, its influences have no strict guide,
Mandarin, the world’s most spoken language, boasts far less words as its pride.

It may be the only language I know, I know, but I recognise its many flaws.
People new to its intricacies must so struggle to master its complex laws.
“I before E – except after C”, verbs, nouns, pronouns, subjective or not,
Are simple compared to the adjectives and adverbs, prepositions, the lot.
So many words spelt exactly the same, but used in a totally different context,
Depending upon (or is that on) who (or is it whom) articulates the content.
Consider the following words and phrases, and tell me what it really means,
Words with diverse meanings, means all is often not always as it seems.

For example:

Right is not right, it’s Left that’s right, I have defined,
I once was Right, but now I have left that right behind.
I object to that object, and its objective, it’s just wrong.
I refuse that refuse, and I long for it to be long gone.
For a start its objectives are simply not objective at all,
It mostly favours the rich and seems to ignore the poor poor.

It used to make me feel tense; anxiety drove the life I lead;
But that’s now past tense; now it’s a very different life I lead.
I’m no longer self-centred; I accept that it’s not all about me,
Except for my health I have an obligation to serve all about me.
Roll with the punches, we must fight the good fight, since
That’s our role in life, from the day we’re born and since.

We all seem to like people who are like ourselves, or the same,
We’re often not game to admit to ourselves that life is just a game.
We feel we are all on our own if we don’t own all as others own,
But that standard set of standards are not mine, I have my own.
The most important is humility, to appreciate all we’ve been given,
To live one day at a time, to love every moment, to me it’s a given.

Our language must surely be so difficult for people from overseas,
It has evolved over six thousand years, but it seems nobody oversees.
Anybody for whom English is not their own natural form of address.
Are disadvantaged by their place of birth and their original address.
Homographs would make them lie down and bring a tear to their eye,
Or just them tear up the dictionary and conclude it’s all a big lie.

And, finally, the big question that seems to fall upon the deaf,
Why is it that the word “phonetics” is not spelt with an “F”?

Geoff Mooney